Looking to add some laughter to your day? Get ready for a dose of entertainment with these hilarious New England Patriot jokes. Whether you are a die-hard fan or just love a good joke, these gems are sure to bring a smile to your face. From puns about Tom Brady to playful jabs at the team’s rivals, these jokes are perfect for any football enthusiast.
As one of the most successful teams in the NFL, the New England Patriots have amassed a large following of supporters and critics alike. With their impressive track record and passionate fan base, there is no shortage of material for comedy. These jokes playfully highlight the quirks and stereotypes associated with the team and its players, making light of their triumphs and shortcomings in a light-hearted manner.
So sit back, relax, and get ready to enjoy some good-natured humor with these New England Patriot jokes. Whether you’re gearing up for game day or just in need of a good laugh, these jokes are a fun way to show your team spirit and share in the camaraderie of being a football fan.
Best New England Patriot Jokes
Here’s five jokes about New England Patriot:
1. Why did the New England Patriots go to the bank? To get their quarterback!
2. What do you call a Patriots player with a Super Bowl ring? A thief.
3. Why did the New England Patriots eat their cereal with a fork? They couldn’t get past the bowls!
4. How do the New England Patriots spend their off-season? Counting all their rings!
5. What do you call a Patriots player with a high IQ? A sideline reporter.
Family Friendly New England Patriot Jokes
Here’s some family friendly funny jokes about New England Patriot:
1. Why did the New England Patriots hire a sailboat captain? They heard he was great at navigating through rough waters.
2. How do New England Patriots players stay cool during games? They have lots of fans.
3. What do you call it when a New England Patriots player takes a day off? A Tom Brady.
4. Why did the New England Patriots coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback.
5. What do you call a New England Patriots player who can play the piano? A touchdown maestro.
6. Why did the New England Patriots player go to the dentist? To get their tooth deflated.
7. What did the New England Patriots fan say to their TV during a game? “DonÕt deflate on me now!”
8. How do New England Patriots players like their eggs in the morning? Under-inflated.
9. Why was the New England Patriots player always calm on the field? He had a lot of DEFlate button.
10. What do you call a New England Patriots player who is also a magician? Tom Brady-dini.
11. Why did the New England Patriots receiver go to the doctor? He had too many drops.
12. What do New England Patriots fans use to keep their drinks cold? Bill Belichick.
13. Why donÕt New England Patriots players ever get lost? Because they always follow the playbook.
14. What do you call a New England Patriots player who is afraid of the dark? A scaredy-Pat.
15. Why did the New England Patriots draft a chef? They needed someone to cook up some wins.
16. What do New England Patriots players do before a game? They Brady themselves.
17. Why did the New England Patriots player bring a ladder to the game? He heard they had a high passing game.
18. What do you call a New England Patriots player who loves to dance? A touchdown boogie-er.
19. How do New England Patriots players stay warm during cold games? They huddle for heat.
20. Why did the New England Patriots player bring a pencil to the game? To draw up some winning plays.
New England Patriot Jokes One-liners – Short Jokes
1. Why did the New England Patriots go to the bank? To get their Belichick!
2. Why are the New England Patriots like a smartphone? Because they always have a strong connection.
3. What do you call a New England Patriot with a championship ring? A lord of the rings.
4. How does a New England Patriot keep warm in the winter? They huddle up!
5. Why did the New England Patriots wear sunglasses? Because their future is so bright.
6. What do you call a magic football that wins every game for the New England Patriots? A “touchdown” spell.
7. How do the New England Patriots stay cool during a game? They have a lot of fans!
8. Why did the New England Patriots invite a baker to their game? They wanted to have a turnover.
9. How does a New England Patriot answer the phone? With a Super Bowl hello!
10. What do you call a New England Patriot who gets lost in the woods? A lost Tom Brady.
11. Why was the New England Patriots’ field always so neat? Because they had Gronkkeepers.
12. How do New England Patriots fans keep their spirits up during a tough season? With a little Belichick-me-up!
13. What do you call a New England Patriot who wins the lottery? A lucky jersey.
14. Why do New England Patriots players make terrible librarians? Because they can’t stop yelling “touchdown”!
15. What do you get when you cross a New England Patriot with a dog? A “patriot retriever.”
16. Why do New England Patriots fans love gardening? Because they have a strong rooting interest.
17. How does a New England Patriot like their coffee? Patriotically strong, just like their team.
18. What do New England Patriots players use to keep their hair in place during games? Belichick tape.
19. How do New England Patriots players stay in touch on the field? With a tight end connection.
20. Why don’t New England Patriots fans ever get lost? Because they always follow the “Patriot way.”
New England Patriot Dad Jokes
1. Why did the New England Patriots coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback!
2. What do you call it when Tom Brady takes a nap? A power snooze!
3. Why did the Patriots install a new clock at their stadium? To give Tom Brady more time to throw!
4. How do the Patriots stay cool during games? They have a lot of fans!
5. Why was the football game in New England like a cake? Because the Patriots always take the last quarter!
6. What do you call a Patriots player who is also a gardener? A grass kicker!
7. Why did the Patriots invite a magician to their game? To help with their disappearing lead!
8. How do the Patriots like their eggs? In a turnover!
9. Why was the football game so loud in New England? Because the fans were Brady-ing their voices!
10. What’s Tom Brady’s favorite dessert? Touchdown turnovers!
11. Why don’t the Patriots ever get lost? Because they always follow their Belichick-tion!
12. How do Patriots players warm up before a game? They do some Gronk stretches!
13. Why did the Patriots coach go to the bank? To make some Belichick-ments!
14. What did the Patriots player say to the football before the game? “Inflate me to victory!”
15. Why did the Patriots invite a baker to their game? To help them with all the turnovers!
16. Why do Patriots fans never sweat during games? Because they always have their Bill Beli-chill caps on!
17. What do you call a Patriots player in a suit and tie? A tight Belichick!
18. Why don’t the Patriots play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when Gronk is on the field!
19. What’s Tom Brady’s favorite movie genre? Touchdown drama!
20. Why did the Patriots player bring a ladder to the game? To catch a Hail Mary!
New England Patriot Surreal Jokes
1. Why did the New England Patriots bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard the competition was fierce!
2. How do New England Patriots players stay cool during a game? They stand next to their fans!
3. What do you call it when a New England Patriots player gets locked out of their house? A tackle box!
4. Why did the New England Patriots coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback!
5. Why was the New England Patriots football field always so wet? Because of all the Patriots making waves!
6. How do New England Patriots players stay in shape? They exercise their Pat-riots!
7. What’s a New England Patriots player’s favorite type of music? Catchy tunes!
8. Why was the New England Patriots player a terrible magician? Because every time he tried to pull a rabbit out of his hat, he fumbled!
9. What do New England Patriots players do when they’re feeling chilly? They huddle for warmth!
10. How did the New England Patriots player fix his broken car? He gave it a Tom Brady!
11. Why did the New England Patriots player bring a pencil to the game? In case he needed to tackle!
12. What do you call a New England Patriots player who loves to garden? A turf-tiller!
13. How do New England Patriots players like their sandwiches? Tight-end-wiches!
14. Why did the New England Patriots player go to the doctor? He heard he had a case of the blitz!
15. What do New England Patriots players use to text each other? Touchdown passes!
16. Why did the New England Patriots player bring a map to the game? In case he needed to tackle the end zone!
17. How do New England Patriots players like their eggs? Intercepted!
18. Why did the New England Patriots player go to the bakery? He heard they had great turnovers!
19. Why did the New England Patriots player go to the movie theater? He heard they were showing “The Gronkfather”!
20. What’s a New England Patriots player’s favorite dessert? Touchdown-doughnuts!
New England Patriot Dark Humor Jokes
Here’s some funny New England Patriot jokes for adults:
1. Why did the New England Patriots cancel their team BBQ? They couldn’t find a grill that could properly inflate the hot dogs.
2. How do you stop a Patriots fan from beating you in an argument? Just mention anything about deflated footballs.
3. What do you call a Patriots player with a Super Bowl ring? A thief.
4. Why did the New England Patriots start a gardening club? Because they heard they were experts at deflating balls.
5. How do you know when a Patriots fan is lying? Their lips are moving.
6. Why did the New England Patriots change their name to the New England Deflatriots? Because cheating runs in their blood.
7. What’s the difference between a Patriots fan and a baby? Eventually, the baby stops whining.
8. Why do Patriots fans always carry a map? In case they need to find their way out of Tom Brady’s shadow.
9. What do you call a Patriots player in the Hall of Fame? A janitor, because they clean up all their cheating scandals.
10. Why did the New England Patriots go to the bank? To try and get a better interest rate for their deflated balls.
11. Why was the Patriots playbook stolen? To find out if cheating is actually written down somewhere.
12. How do Patriots players stay warm during the winter? They stand next to their burning Spygate tapes.
13. Why did the New England Patriots start a band? They heard they were good at playing underinflated instruments.
14. How do you get a Patriots fan to stop talking? Just mention their record in Super Bowls without Tom Brady.
15. Why did the Patriots player bring a ladder to the game? So they could get a better view of the opponent’s signals.
16. What’s the difference between a Patriots player and a battery? A battery has a positive side.
17. Why did the Patriots player go to school? To learn how to properly deflate balls without getting caught.
18. What do you call a Patriots fan wearing a suit and tie? The defendant.
19. Why did the New England Patriots open a bakery? To have a place to store all their secret recordings.
20. How do you make a Patriots fan laugh on Monday? Tell them a Brady-less team has a chance at winning the Super Bowl.
How to Use New England Patriot Jokes In a Conversation?
When it comes to adding humor to a conversation, New England Patriot jokes can be a great way to bring some light-heartedness to the discussion. Whether you are a football fan or not, these jokes can be used in various social settings to break the ice or simply make people laugh. By incorporating clever and witty jokes about the New England Patriots, you can easily engage with others and create a fun and enjoyable atmosphere.
Tailgating at a Party
If you find yourself at a party or social gathering where football is a common topic, consider using some New England Patriot jokes to lighten the mood. For example, you can say something like, “Why did the New England Patriots go to the bank? To get their quarterback!”
Office Watercooler Chat
Using New England Patriot jokes at work can be a fun way to connect with colleagues, especially during football season. Try something like, “Why did the New England Patriots refuse to play football in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!” This type of joke is light-hearted and can help create a sense of camaraderie among coworkers.
Family Gatherings
Family gatherings are the perfect opportunity to share some New England Patriot jokes with loved ones. You can try a joke like, “What do you call a Patriot who insists on becoming a magician? Tom Brady-dini!” This type of joke is harmless and can bring a smile to everyone’s face.
Networking Events
If you are attending a networking event or meeting new people, using New England Patriot jokes can be a great way to make a lasting impression. Consider saying something like, “Why did the New England Patriots wear their jerseys to the tanning salon? They wanted to get that golden touch!” This type of joke shows your sense of humor and can help you connect with others in a light-hearted way.
By incorporating New England Patriot jokes into your conversations, you can easily add some fun and laughter to any social setting. Just remember to read the room and use jokes that are appropriate for the audience and situation.
Final words
In conclusion, New England Patriot jokes have become a staple in the realm of football humor. From poking fun at their deflate-gate scandal to their numerous Super Bowl victories, these jokes never fail to bring a smile to football fans’ faces. The creativity and wit behind these jokes showcase the playful banter and friendly rivalries that make the sport even more enjoyable. Whether you’re a die-hard Patriots fan or a devoted supporter of a rival team, these witty and hilarious New England Patriot jokes are sure to entertain and lighten the mood during the football season.
